Ladies and gentlemen … your Miami Heat

This is pretty much it for the Miami Heat. This is three of their four players. And they are 3-to-1 odds to win the NBA title in 2011. … With four players. 

Oddly enough, Mario Chalmers wasn’t in attendance. Earlier in the night, LeBron James had made it rain on Chalmers’ head while laughing maniacally, stealing his number and driving away in his Maserati. Chalmers said he was was too busy making the payment on his Prius to make it.

I remember when I used to do this on NBA Live for PlayStation2. I’d turn off the salary cap function and then just load up the Phoenix Suns with a lot of players they’d never get in real life just to see what they’d look like in a Suns uniform and how badly I could crush teams with the Super Team that I had created. It just doesn’t seem right in real life. I could live, and even kind of liked, the Boston Celtics’ Big Three. Why? Because we all knew Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce and Ray Allen were close to being over the hill when they signed there. They definitely showed they are this year and they still dominated down the stretch.

With that said, what kind of New York Yankees-style havoc are these guys going to wreck if they get a bunch of decent veterans like Mike Miller, Jason Kapono and, I’m not joking here, Derek Fisher and Shaquille O’Neal to surround them. I hope Shaq doesn’t come because he’ll just drag everything down. (OK, maybe I do want him to go there.)  Apparently, all of Miami’s decent veterans from last season (Udonis Haslem, Dorell Wright, Quentin Richardson, Carlos Arroyo and Jamaal Magloire) all want to return and take a pay cut so they can play for Team USA Light.

Read this story from the Miami Herald and you’ll be amazed at some of the guys the Heat are going after who all will have to sign for far less than they would anywhere else. 

When reached for comment, a drunken Dan Gilbert looked into the camera, smirked and said, "I hope LeBron blows out his knee." Then, right after sipping a $100 shot of whiskey, proclaimed that the Cavaliers were going to beat the Dakota Wizards 2-1 for the NBDL title in 2011.

One thought on “Ladies and gentlemen … your Miami Heat

  1. This is why the NBA is the 3rd most popular sport. Look at MLB, where the Rays go to the World Series for crying out loud. So many teams in baseball are competitive, and in the NBA, it will be the Lakers, Magic, C’s, Thunder, and maybe the Mav’s. The rest are just pretenders or awful teams. You can’t be a league where over half your teams make the playoffs. MLB is not perfect by any means (All Star game anyone?), but the quality of play is good, there is more competitiveness, its way tougher to make the post season and too many bad games are played during the season. The playoffs get good at the Conference Finals, but the NBA sucks overall. Defend your league in 7 seconds or less!

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